Resolution resolved

For many years I always made my New Year's resolution(s) and promptly lost sight of them by the 15th of January. I would feel as if I had let myself down and did not have the self discipline to keep my word to myself.  That is until New Year's Eve 2002.
When I was 18 years old I started smoking cigarettes and admittedly I did enjoy a good cigarette after each and every meal, but especially that first cigarette in the morning.  I was a happy smoker for 16 years, I did make the commitment that I would not smoke in the house with my children around, unfortunately it was a commitment that was an on and off thing. These were the years before it was well known about the effects of second hand smoke.  As my children got older they began a campaign to get me to quit smoking, for every commercial that would come on about the effects of smoking they would point it out to me.  They would ask "when are you going to quit smoking Mommy?" Let's just say they really put the desire to quit in my heart and mind.  So that became my New Year's resolution for many years and year after year I did manage to quit for about a week at a time.  But I was never able to get to the point that I just did not want a cigarette. Now the part that always amazes me is that with each pregnancy I was able to quit smoking with no problem whatsoever and I would manage to stay a non smoker for a year or more afterwards. But the desire to smoke was always present and therefore I would pick up the habit again.  Then in 2002 on my birthday, I won't mention which one, I decided it was time, I did not want to start the new year being a smoker and I did let my children know of my decision, needless to say they were very happy.  The next decision I had to make was how to go about the process of quitting and staying a non smoker, I thought about the patch, the nicotine gum, I even thought of hypnosis, none of which really resonated with me.  I knew my habit of smoking was more than just the act of smoking, it was the feeling of peace and contentment I had when I smoked a cigarette, and yes there was some joy to it also. I really liked smoking cigarettes, I finally understood what my Grandmother meant when she said that "cigarettes were her best friends", I found I felt the same way.  But I had made the promise not only to myself but also to my children that I was NOT going to be a smoker come January 1, 2003, I was determined.  I had given myself six months to figure it out and to implement my plan and stick with it.  That is when I knew I had to go back to my roots and what I knew worked in all things, prayer.  I never prayed to quit smoking, I prayed for the removal of the taste of smoking to be taken away, and the desire, talk about praying without ceasing.  I knew with every fiber of my being that I no longer wanted to be a smoker, I did not want the report from the doctor giving me the options of quitting or dying as had happened with my Grandmother and Father. So as December 31st approached I was nervous that I would not be able to keep this particular promise, I mean we are talking about quitting smoking!  My children on the other hand were getting quite excited about the idea of having a non smoking Mommy and they let it be known that I had to stick with it because I had promised them.  December 31, 2002 we were watching Dick Clark's New Year Rockin Eve, and then it happened the ball began to drop and as each number of the countdown passed, I took a drag of my LAST cigarette.  At 12:00 am I was now on my journey to quitting and to make sure I started out correctly my children took all my cigarettes and tore them up and threw them away, took every ashtray and lighter and threw them away also, I knew there was no turning back.  I knew that I would have to take it day by day, week by week, or I was going to overwhelm myself and give up, so that is what I did, everyday without smoking was a victory.  There were some days that all I wanted was a cigarette to help calm my nerves, but I had to find something new.  So I focused on working, volunteering at my children's school and at church, and reading.  Before I knew it a month had passed and that urge/desire to smoke was dissipating everyday I went without.  I am now a happy non smoker for 10 years now and since that night in 2002 I never looked back.

I really have not focused on New Year resolutions since 2002, but for 2013 I have resolved to get better and better day by day, one day at a time.  What ever your New Year resolution may be take it a day at a time for everyday is a victory, even when you slip up a bit.  Stick to it and you can and will accomplish all that you desire.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

Peace and blessings